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The
Fivepenny Piece Songs A-C
The
Fivepenny Piece Songs pages list in alphabetical
order all the known songs* (not forgetting the monologues!)
recorded or written by The Fivepenny Piece,
and give brief notes about each. This is the index
page, which gives a complete alphabetical index of
all the songs. Further information about the individual
songs is given in these pages:
Part
1 (A-C) |
Part 2 (D-F) |
Part 3 (G-J) |
Part 4 (K-O) |
Part 5 (P-S) |
Part 6 (T-Z)
or just click on the song title below to go
to the appropriate page. If anyone knows of any other
songs not in the list, then
please let us know.
*
songs from the CD 57 Fivepenny Favourites have
not been included in this list, as these are all medleys
of extracts of songs made famous by others, and are
not really typical The Fivepenny Piece material.

Song
Title & Composer(s) |
Track
info / Notes |
Affluence
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe - Eddie Crotty) |
Excellent song from the King Cotton
album about the youth of today wanting more
brass. And that was in the 1970s! The band
are in fine voice on this great group
effort with a high Lancashire quotient.
LP:
King Cotton; LP:
Very Best Of The Fivepenny Piece; CD:
Better Than Ever |
Air Hostess, The
(Nick Brackin) |
Humorous tale about an air hostess and the
airliner's captain. I've been unable to find
out anything about writer Nick Brackin,
who wrote several songs recorded by The Fivepenny
Piece.
LP:
Here We Are Again; CD:
Here We Are Again |
Albert's Apple Tree
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe) |
Humorous song from the Telling Tales
album, with John on lead vocals. It concerns
the perils of trying to grow apple trees in
soil from Yorkshire.
LP:
Telling Tales |
Amore
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe - Renato Pareti
- Alberto Salerno) |
Romantic song from the Peddlers of Songs
album. Pareti and Salerno are Italian songwriters
- I don't know whether they collaborated with
our lads, or whether John and Colin translated
the Italian lyrics.
LP:
Peddlers Of Songs |
Armchair Athlete
(music: John Meeks; words: Colin Radcliffe,
Phil Barlow, David Waggett) |
Song about a chap who decides it's easier
to watch sports on TV than to participate.
Phil Barlow was the band's regular drummer,
but I don't know who David Waggett is.
LP:
The Fivepenny Piece On Stage Again |
Ashton Mashers
(Trad. written - arr./adapt. Eddie Crotty)
Lyrics
here
|
Although
credited to Eddie Crotty, the original version
of this song was written by a duo The Brothers
Malone, a music hall act from the early
20th century who used to perform in the North-West.
Originally a slightly different song named
after the act, as their sort of signature
tune or theme song. The song was re-written
by the 'brothers' with a slightly different
tune in a few local variants of which Ashton
Mashers is one. Other versions are known
to exist for Rochdale and Oldham, with suitable
variations in the detail of the lyrics, such
as the use of local street names. A verse
of the original Brothers Malone song
can be heard on the album Golden Stream
by the late great Harry Boardman, who
also sang Ashton Mashers on the same
LP. Other versions of the 'Mashers' song may
well have existed.
LP:
Wish You Were Here; LP:
This Is The Fivepenny Piece |
Away
In A Manger
(Trad. - arr. John Meeks)
|
A
new arrangement of the classic Christmas Carol
recorded for the band's 2008 Christmas album.
CD:
A Special Child
|
Aylesbury Duck, The
(???) |
A
monologue by Eddie recorded in 2007 for the
It All Began album.
CD:
Where It All Began |


Song
Title & Composer(s) |
Track
info / Notes |
Ballad Of Emmylou
(Trevor Chance - Colin Radcliffe) |
Song in the spirit of Benny Hill's Ernie,
from the Here We Are Again album. Written
by Trevor Chance and Colin Radcliffe. Sung
- or rather, spoken - by Eddie.
LP:
Here We Are Again; CD:
Here We Are Again |
Bantam Cock
(Jake Thackray) |
Humorous song concerning the capers of the
eponymous cockerel with an eye for the birds.
Written by the superb singer/songwriter Jake
Thackray, and far and away his most covered
song, having been recorded by Fred Wedlock,
The Corries and Jasper Carrott,
among others. The Fivepenny Piece's version
appeared on the live On Stage Again
album, and gives us a rare chance to hear
George on lead vocals - his highly original
rendition adds to the hilarity! The lyrics
are transcribed on Jake
Thackray's website.
LP:
The Fivepenny Piece On Stage Again; LP:
Very Best Of The Fivepenny Piece |
|
Battle Of Hastings 1066
(Marriott Edgar)
The
lyrics are transcribed on the Monologues
website. |
One of the many famous monologues written
between the wars by Marriott Edgar,
and made famous by Stanley Holloway.
Here, Eddie Crotty tells of King 'Arold and
the fate that befell him at that historic
encounter with the Normans. Re-recorded in
2007 for the It All Began album.
LP:
The Fivepenny Piece On Stage; CD:
Where It All Began |
Best Of Order, Thank You Please!
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe) |
This song was never performed by Fivepenny
Piece but was written especially for Lancashire
comic Colin Crompton, perhaps best
known in his persona as 'chairman' of the
popular Wheeltappers & Shunters Club
on Granada TV. The song's title was the comedian's
catchphrase on the programme. The Fivepenny
Piece appeared as guest artists at least once
on the TV show - see the The
Fivepenny Piece On TV page.
Unrecorded
by The Fivepenny Piece |
|
Big Jim
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe - Eddie Crotty)
Lyrics
here |
Still one of The Fivepenny Piece's most popular
and best-remembered songs, telling the tale
of the mighty worm fed on an unusual diet.
There are three different recordings of the
song - the original one on the first LP (which
also appears on the Collection CD), the 1975
re-recorded version released as a single (which
also appears on the Very Best Of CD); and
a different version which appears on the Here
We Are Again album. And, of course,
there is also the sequel Big
Jim Meets Nessie (see below).
single:
Big Jim; LP:
The Fivepenny Piece; LP:
Very Best Of The Fivepenny Piece; LP:
Here We Are Again; CD:
Very Best Of The Fivepenny Piece; CD:
Here We Are Again; CD:
Lanky Spoken Here (1) |
Big Jim Meets Nessie
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe) |
On the live On Stage Again album, this
song is a sequel to the ever-popular Big
Jim and tells of the historic meeting
between the legendary, fabled, almost mythical
great creature, and the Scottish loch-dwelling
monster.
LP:
The Fivepenny Piece On Stage Again |
Black Pud Stud
(Dave Dutton - Bernard Wrigley) |
Song about a chap who's fond of black pudding,
written by the "Bowton Bullfrog"
with Lanky professor Dave Dutton, and
recorded on the album An Evening With The
Fivepenny Piece. The tune is very similar
to that of The Yellow Rose Of Texas.
LP:
An Evening With The Fivepenny Piece |
Bob Platt
(Eddie Crotty) |
Short song by Eddie about a chap who comes
home from work only to find his wife out and
his tea cooking on the stove, and feeling
clemmed he decides not to wait...
LP:
The Fivepenny Piece |
Bonnie Brid
(Samuel Laycock - John Meeks) |
One of the most well-known Lancashire dialect
poems, this was written by the famous poet
Samuel Laycock who (although born in Yorkshire)
spent much of his life in The Fivepenny Piece's
home town of Stalybridge, before moving to
Blackpool. A new version of the song was released
in 2004 on John Meeks' first solo CD.
This poem was written in 1864 in Stalybridge
at the time of the cotton famine and is addressed
from a father to his new-born child, the "bonnie
brid" (bird) of the title. This moving
and tender poem about the hardship of bringing
up a family during those difficult times has
been set to a beautiful melody by John Meeks.
The words to this song, and more about Sam
Laycock and the cotton famine can be seen
at the Stalybridge
Online website.
LP:
Wish You Were Here; LP:
Lancashire My Lancashire; Just
Me And Some Of Mi Songs |
Boozer's Lament
(words: James Johnson, music: John Meeks &
Colin Radcliffe) |
A song dear to the heart of an ale drinker,
bemoaning the replacement of real ale with
keg fizz, the theming of pubs, and other related
issues still being fought by CAMRA (The Campaign
For Real Ale) in the 21st century. I've been
unable to find out anything about lyricist
James Johnson.
LP:
Telling Tales |
Bottoms Up!
(Nick Brackin) |
Another humorous monologue from Nick Brackin,
who wrote several items recorded by the group
over the years. Vocalised by Eddie.
LP:
Here We Are Again; CD:
Here We Are Again |
Bowton's Yard
(Samuel Laycock - Eddie Crotty) |
Another well-known poem by Samuel Laycock,
in the Lancashire dialect, set to music by
Eddie Crotty. The song is about Bolton's Yard
in the Castle Hall area of Stalybridge, and
the various characters and tradesfolk who
lived there in the mid-19th century. The yard
itself was demolished in the 20th century
slum clearances of the area, so sadly it can
no longer be seen. Re-recorded in 2007 for
the It All Began album.
For
more details on Sam Laycock, and the words
to this song, visit the Stalybridge
Online website.
LP:
Songs We Like To Sing; CD:
Where It All Began |
|
Brown Photographs
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe)
Lyrics
here
|
One of the most enduring songs written by
the Meeks-Radcliffe partnership, this beautiful
song appeared on The Fivepenny Piece's first
live On Stage album, sung by John.
It was also used on the King Cotton
album (this time sung by Lynda) as a link
between the other songs. The song refers to
the old fading photographs the young lad would
be shown as he sat on his grandmother's knee,
bringing to life the times gone by, and the
people who have aged or are no longer with
us. Newer versions of the song appeared on
John Meeks' 2004 solo album, and the 2007
It All Began album.
LP:
The Fivepenny Piece On Stage; LP:
Lancashire My Lancashire; Just
Me And Some Of Mi Songs; CD:
Where It All Began |
Buggerlugs Loves Sugar Butty
(Dave Dutton - Bernard Wrigley) |
A Lanky love song, sung by its composer Bernard
Wrigley on the Lanky Spoken Here!
album, and later recorded by The Fivepenny
Piece on their 1979 LP Life Is A Game Of
Chance.
LP:
Life Is A Game Of Chance |
Butterflies And Songbirds
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe) |
Originally issued as the B-side to the 1974
single release of Save Your Last Kiss
For Me, this pop-oriented song (with
perhaps a country tinge) reappeared on the
Telling Tales album a few years later.
single:
Save Your Last Kiss For Me; LP:
Telling Tales |


Song
Title & Composer(s)
|
Track
info / Notes |
Can I?
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe) |
A
new song recorded in 2007 for the It All
Began album.
CD:
Where It All Began |
Can't See The Wood For The Trees
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe) |
A pop-oriented song with a very catchy tune,
which (like so many others among the The Fivepenny
Piece's pop-oriented output) could easily
have been a chart hit had it been issued on
a single. Lynda sings lead on this one.
LP:
Both Sides Of Fivepenny Piece |
City Of Manchester
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe) |
Homage to that great city not far from Ashton,
first issued on the LP Both Sides of Fivepenny
Piece, and re-appearing as the opening
track on the Lancashire My Lancashire
compilation album.
LP:
Both Sides Of Fivepenny Piece; LP:
Lancashire My Lancashire |
Colours Of My Life
(John Meeks - Colin Radcliffe) |
A
new song recorded in 2007 for the It All
Began album.
CD:
Where It All Began |
Come Whoam To Thi Childer An Me
(John Meeks - Waugh) |
A
new song recorded in 2007 for the It All
Began album.
CD:
Where It All Began |
Cum To Your Tea
(Horace Slater - John Meeks) although credited
on the album to (Cook - John Meeks) |
Based on a Lancashire dialect poem Cum
To Thi Tay, this was adapted slightly
so that Lynda could sing it to George on the
Fivepenny Piece On Stage album. It
tells of a young lass anxious to get her boyfriend
to come to her folks' home for tea, and was
based on the songwriter's own experience when
he met his future In-laws!
Although
credited to 'Cook' on the album, this poem
was written by Horace Slater, and first published
in the Oldham Chronicle between 1956 and 1959.
It was included with another poem, "In
t' Park", in a book of dialect poems
entitled "Lancashire Miscellany"
edited by James Bennett and published in 1960.
Horace Slater is listed in the Lancashire
Lantern website, in the poet index; he
wrote many dialect poems and was very proud
that these two were published in a book. He
was also very proud that The Fivepenny Piece
put his poem to music. Horace died in 1983
in Blackpool, a place he detested, but due
to circumstances spent the last years of his
life living there.
LP:
Fivepenny Piece On Stage; LP:
Lancashire My Lancashire |

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